Milestone. Yesterday my sister Katherine and I ran our first race for a Type 1 Diabetes (T1D) in Seattle. The JDRF run supports research for better T1D management, mitigating the long and weighty list of longterm side effects I’m slowly and horrifyingly learning about (kidney failure, heart disease, eye degeneration, etc.), and finding a cure. So we ran in honor of Charlotte, my nine and a half year old daughter with T1D. It’s all important, but let me be clear, we want a cure.
I am only eight weeks into Charlotte’s T1D but that’s what I want. Not a tropical vacation, though my weary body could use a dose of vitamin D. Not a new hybrid car, or better yet, Carmen Ghia, since my aging mini van doesn’t suit my zany, effervescence. Not a new swanky wardrobe, though I’d love to haul most of what I own to the Goodwill. Simply a cure.
So we ran the 8k with a real purpose and sponsors behind us donating more than $2,000 to the JDRF. Katherine ran like the wind with dedication, force, and zeal. But for me, each step felt oddly heavy. My usual gait disappeared. I couldn’t find my rhythm. It was infuriatingly hard. I could chalk it up to my general state of emotional upheaval or my eight weeks of restless, worry-laden sleep. But really, I think the weight of Charlotte’s disease overpowered me.
Don’t get me wrong. The sight of so many people running for family members or friends with T1D was inspiring. Truly awesome. But what struck me most was that I’m neither an onlooker nor a person immersed in philanthropy because I care. I was there and am here on this page because I have to be. My beloved daughter has T1D. And that won’t change.
Pre-race I was teary. Wondering about every T1D story behind each person among the more than 11,000 around us. And then it dawned on me: I have a new community of people who grapple with profound life changes and the heartbreak of disease. Who have a purpose – to find a cure for the people they love.
It didn’t lighten my step yesterday. But it gave me hope and inspiration. And helped me feel less alone. Especially in the company of my amazing sister who has wholeheartedly joined me in this quest. Here’s to the next run and fleeter feet.